Hold yourself tightly
let your nails draw blood
from material stretched too tight over shattered bones
sharpened points ripping at the seams
cutting away the last of his finger prints
embedded into your skin

When the ground starts to shiver
jump on the nearest passerby
feel for any grip possible
climb your way up his cracked spine

See the street that has trapped your memories under its pavement
feel them rush back to you in tsunamis, breaking the cities under your eyes
keep walking
crush your feet into the sidewalk
don't look back

Look at the mangled face staring back at you
it's 4 a.m. and you can still see the names he called you
as if they were tattooed on to your face
stop your hand from reaching into the medicine cabinet
go back to bed
bury your pain in the sheets

Hang on to his smile
don't look down, don't let go
push yourself up and find safety in his eyes
no one will find you there

Sew bones back together with heart strings
it will never be the same but it's still something
let your tears fall in rain showers
jump in the puddles afterwards

You can't scrub away his breath on your neck
but you can rinse off the guilt and self loathing
open up your hands to the sky waiting
to catch rainbows made of real smiles